Blog by: Lata Advani Viseu

When you try your best, but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something, you can’t replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
Fix You – Coldplay

The start of a new decade and resolutions have or have not been made. If you have made resolutions to be the best version of you in some area of your life, this is the time where you are still going strong or you are already pretty much over it.

Instead of resolutions to lose weight, find a life partner, make a lot of money or any other goals you may have made, how about focusing on a couple of areas in your life that limit you from being your best self and working on those instead, or maybe, seeing the positive side of the thing you think limits you?

I prefer to focus on emotions and states of mind, like happiness and peace of mind instead of a specific goal. Happiness is subjective and may mean different things to different people, so think of things that you enjoy doing that bring you those emotions.

I love to travel, dance, read books and help people realize that by changing their mind, they can change their lives. If these are the things that bring joy to me and I focus on them instead of trying to fight the things that I want to change about myself, I believe happiness and peace of mind are likely to be the outcome.

Someone asked me recently, as a leader of a department who does not like conflict in general, is it not something that I should try and overcome? To be honest, I have been to trainings, read books on how to handle situations but have finally come to realize, that it is just not me.

I have goals but I am not cut-throat ambitious, and I have never asked for promotions, yet, those that moved me up, did so because they saw something that they liked and believed in me. If I was to change and not be true to myself, I wouldn’t be where I am in my career and happy and at peace too.

I have finally realized that instead of changing, to become something I am not; I am going to see the positive side of the thing that I am not and focus on enhancing that.

For every negative situation, there is a positive side and for every positive side there is an opposite side as well. What you choose to focus on, is up to you.

If travelling, dancing, reading and helping people are the things that make me happy, I need to make time for them and perhaps give up some things that are draining me.

If I can’t travel to an exotic place right now because of time restraints, I can do a short road trip somewhere closer. If I can’t go dancing every night, I can do so on the weekends and during the week put on headphones and dance at home. If I can’t finish reading a book in a day, a week or a month, I can read a page or two instead.

For the part of being able to help others change their mind to change their life, every day, I tell the Universe – thank you for all that I have, I am so lucky to have a loving, supportive family, good health, a good job, great colleagues, friends and; if there is something more out there for me to live my best life, bring it on so that I can help others live their best life too.

Ever since I began doing that, I am being drawn to people that I can help using my learnings, experiences and trainings in NLP, hypnosis and other modalities.

If there is one thing to do to get started, it is to write in a journal the things that you are grateful for now (there is always something to be grateful for) and soon you’ll realize that you get more of the things that you’re grateful for because by focusing on the positive, you are rewiring your brain and attracting more of the things you focus on.

“Every person, all the events of your life, are there because you have drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.” — Richard Bach

“Have you ever noticed when you have a problem – you are there” – Dr Hew Len.

“Everything you’re running from is in your head’ – Anonymous

“The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time” – John Lennon

“The only person you’re destined to become is the person you decide to be” – Ralph Waldo Emerson